Time For a Quick Update

Howdy!  It has been awhile since I've posted an update.  Life has been very routine with no huge excitement lately. That's AMAZING after all the "excitement" of Joshua's pregnancy!  But for my blog fans out there (I love you, Mom and Dad), here's the update you requested.

JOSHUA:  19 months old now, he is just your typical toddler, always exploring and playing. He loves reading, playing with trucks, and building towers with his Mega Blocks.  This normalcy is beyond our wildest dreams after his rough start.  Sometimes, when we meet new people here in Mississippi, they don't get how scary it was with Joshua in the beginning. They just see a completely normal toddler. If I start to tell his story, their eyes gloss over, or I get a polite response but can tell they're thinking, "uh huh, ya right." That can be annoying sometimes since the first six months of 2012, with our precarious pregnancy and long NICU stay, consisted of the biggest upheaval and testimony of faith in our lives. Now it's as if it's a figment of our imagination.  Actually, that's a good thing. We escaped without any scars, and there's no need to dwell on the difficulty of the past when the present and future are shining so bright.

If you can see it, the bottom line right above Joshua's ear is where he measured at 12 months.

I don't know if Joshua is just glowing from escaping survival mode unscathed, or what, but he is quite possibly the happiest child I've ever seen. Sure he fusses if he's hungry or tired or if he's startled by a loud noise (he's a little sensitive) or if his big brother is too rough with him (but he sure can hold his own now, mastering the Heisman stiff-arm and even going on the offensive at times).  For the most part, though, he's all smiles and giggles. We no longer need to use his adjusted age (based on his due date) to follow his growth or development since he has caught up to his actual age. He just had his 18 month well baby appointment, and he weighs 24.5 lbs, which is in the 23rd percentile for his actual age. His height is in the 48th percentile, and his head circumference is in the 86th percentile. No surprise that he's caught up so well since he eats anything and everything and almost as much as his daddy.

Here's a quick video of how proud Joshua is of his growth.
Look how tall Joshua is!

JEREMIAH: 3.5 years old, he's growing up so quickly. He is enjoying homeschool preschool. It's not really homeschooling, just playing, lots of reading, writing/coloring, and art projects or whatever we feel like doing, but I call it that just because it seems like I'm the only person I know who doesn't send my 3 year old to formal preschool.  We just have fun at home.   He started AWANA Cubbies at church this year, and he absolutely loves it. The latest excitement has been our daily bike rides/walks to watch the big diggers, dump trucks, bulldozers, rollers, etc working in our neighborhood. It's nonstop entertainment for both boys, and they love it when the dump trucks honk and wave.

I LOVE Boys!

About a month ago, Jeremiah convinced us to take the training wheels off his bike. Here's a video. What you can't see in the video is the huge pregnant lady pushing a stroller with one hand and running alongside him with a camera in the other hand, practically jumping with excitement. We were pretty proud of him.

Jeremiah riding with no training wheels! 3.5 years old.

BABY A AND BABY B:  Two days ago, we hit the 29 week milestone. This pregnancy is cruising by pretty smoothly, so I have no complaints. We had a bit of a scare last week when I was having a lot of contractions in a regular pattern, but it turned out to be nothing serious. My uterus is stretched about the same size as a full term singleton pregnancy (6 lbs worth of babies plus lots of amniotic fluid and a huge shared placenta), so it's kind of acting like it's full term. I just overdid it that day and didn't stay on top of my nutrition or fluid intake. It took a few days for the contractions to die down, but we're fine now. It was a wake up call for us to take things down a notch to be a little more sloth-like.

Here's the comparison between 29 weeks with Joshua, about 2 lbs, one week before delivery (and I was sticking my gut out as far as I could to try to look more pregnant!) vs. 29 weeks with two 3+ lb babies.
  

The twins seem to be pretty active, and I'm putting my money on future soccer players, given the way they can kick.  It feels like an octopus lives in my belly! I have continued to get ultrasounds to monitor for growth every three weeks, and they have always been very close in size to each other. Since they share a placenta, one of the risks is discordant growth, where one twin gets more nutrients than the other and grows at a faster rate, but that hasn't been the case with us.  At our last ultrasound, at 26 weeks, they weighed an estimated 2 lbs 2 oz and 2 lbs 4 oz, almost the same size as Joshua at birth (30 weeks).  They were both head down, which is great news for trying to avoid a C-Section (if the first one is breech, I would most likely need a C-section). Hopefully they'll stay in that position.  So far, so good! I'm feeling all of those third trimester annoyances of a normal pregnancy (and then some since it's double the pleasure, double the fun), but I'm not complaining since I missed out on all that with Joshua.  We couldn't be more pleased with how this pregnancy is going!

Welcome 2013!

I initially wrote GOOD RIDDANCE 2012 as a title, but then I changed it, figuring I better keep it more positive.  Let's just say we're happy to officially be in a new year.  I hope everyone had a great Christmas.  We had a nice time celebrating with the boys in Mississippi, but it didn't feel like Christmas without extended family and snow.  We had been traveling so much over the past few months (Minnesota in Oct/Nov and Florida in early Dec, and I was in Texas for a couple of days in Dec), so we didn't have the heart to uproot the boys once we finally stated getting into a routine in our new home.  On Christmas day we donned our shorts and went for a long ride/run (I was on my mountain bike and James ran pushing the double jogger) along the beach to a new playground.  That was a new Christmas tradition for us, and we all had so much fun. See pictures below.

 

Joshua is now 10 months old, and he is growing like a weed...not surprising since his stomach seems to be a bottomless pit. He sure loves to eat!  He has mastered solid foods, and he's down to only a couple of bottles a day (before nap time).  Yesterday he weighed 16 lbs 15.5 oz, which I'll happily round up to 17 lbs.  That's huge.  We were always measuring him on his age adjusted growth scale (based on his due date, not his birth date), and he hovered around the 5th-10th percentile for his adjusted age.  Well, if we look at his adjusted age now, for a 7.5 month old, he'd be at the 26th percentile.  Guess what, folks! He's officially on the 10 month old curve now, and he's in the 7th percentile!  His height is also on the 10 month old curve at around the 10th percentile.  On this pace, he should be "caught up" to normal 12 month olds by his 1st birthday!  Developmentally, it should take 2 years to catch up.   His head circumference is in the 45th percentile for his actual 10 month old age (it has always been big, so not concerning), so he has a big noggin just like his mom and dad.

 

That's about it to report, since the purpose of this blog is mainly to show some pics and videos.  I realize they may be boring to most people, but our family members who haven't seen the kids for awhile might appreciate them. 

 

Oh, you may notice Jeremiah has given Joshua and himself nicknames, and they have stuck. Joshua is Bug.  He has always been so cuddly, and one day I said, "You're my little Cuddle Bug!"  Jeremiah then announced, "We call him BUG!"  He also likes to tell that to everyone, including strangers, which generates some interesting looks.  Jeremiah has named himself Big Pickle, after Goliath in the Veggie Tales movie Dave and the Giant Pickle. He loves doing a straight body fall flat on his face like Goliath did after David hit him with the stone.  He tells everyone to call him Pickle.  

 

  We missed the 8 month old pic since the lamb was packed away by the movers, so here's the 8.5 month picture.

 

It's getting harder to line up Joshua, the lamb, and the sign! 

 

Big Pickle jumping off the bed, his latest favorite hobby. No, we're not trying to generate business for James now that he's back into orthopedics. He lands on a huge pile of blankets and pillows.

 



We came across this Christmas tree scene on the beach one day when we were driving home from church. A professional photographer had it set up for some clients who hadn't shown up yet. She was so nice to let us take a few minutes to take some amateur pics on our own.

 

I love my boys!

 Christmas is so fun!

 

This whole "getting presents thing" is pretty cool!  Forget the rest; I'll just play with the first one I opened.

 

Jeremiah has always had a thing for slides, especially when Dad tries to grab him.

 

It's fun to get thrown up in the air!

 

I'm a spider in a web!

 

I love being LOUD!

 

This video was taken 4 days ago. Joshua creatively maneuvered himself around the room. That's a rare opportunity since it's hard to roam free with his big brother always ready to jump on him. 

 

Yesterday he crawled, kind of!

 



Joshua loves his Johnny Jumper! 

Hanging out with my boys over lunch. 

 

It's so fun to play make believe with Jeremiah. Let's wake up some bears! I didn't grab the camera until the 3rd time I woke up the bears, and it was still fun for him. Oh to be two...

Last video, and you need the volume up to hear Jeremiah singing the Veggie Tales theme song.

 

I accidentally uploaded the wrong pic, and for some reason, I can't delete this, so you can see an outtake, too. 

 



A Belated Thanksgiving Joshua Update

Thanksgiving came and went without a post from me, someone who has so much to be thankful for! Every now and then, I look at Joshua and shake my head in amazement at the way things have turned out. Could it really be, after all he has been through, that Joshua is turning out to be a normal, healthy baby?! God is so GOOD!  Looking back to January 18, 2012, we never would have dreamed of how good he looks now. WOW!

Joshua had his 9 month check up last week. It was all good news. He is right on track with where a 6.5 month old (adjusted age) should be, developmentally. He is rolling both ways, sitting up on his own, interacting appropriately... no concerns. In preemies, the developmental milestones usually catch up to actual age by 2 years old.  Eating solid foods has been a tedious process, but he's showing improvement each day, and it's not concerning at all to his new pediatrician (who we love).  He is drinking 8 oz bottles every 3 hours and acting like he wants to eat more, so we are hoping he really picks up solids quickly. He likes the taste, but his little tongue can't figure out how to push the food back instead of right back out. It's something his new therapist will work with him on. Given his low birth weight, he still qualifies for the state run program to have weekly home PT/OT in Mississippi, just as he did in Colorado. 

Get a load of this: he weighed in at 15 lbs 11 oz!  That's almost on the scale for 9 month olds. He is gaining ground every month, and he is on track to reach that scale by his 12 month appointment.  For length, he is already on the 9 month scale in the 9th percentile, and his head circumference is in the 9 month 40th percentile range. At his appointment, he had his first injection in the series of Synergis, the vaccination to prevent RSV, that nasty virus that can wreak havoc on babies in the winter.  We have been expecting a hospital admission if/when it hits.  The doctor told us he is no longer a tiny, weak baby, and if he catches a cold, he will most likely act like any other baby his age, so we don't have to worry. Now it looks like we'll find out firsthand because Jeremiah is getting over a case of croup, and now I have a cold. Two nights ago, Joshua had such bad nasal congestion that he woke up every 30 minutes fussing from difficulty breathing. Finally I spent the rest of the night with him on the recliner, and he slept a little better upright.

Speaking of the glamorous life of motherhood, I had one of those moments this morning that I imagine every mom has where we step outside ourselves remembering our carefree days of youth and wonder "how did my life turn into this?" Jeremiah, who as I mentioned has been sick, hadn't been sleeping well, so when he fell asleep in the stroller yesterday at 3:00 PM, we decided to just keep him in there to let him sleep. He was out for the night, and at about 10:00, I transferred the sleeping cutiepie to his bed (which is actually a blanket on the floor since he has refused his new twin bed since moving to our new house), and he didn't even stir. Well, no surprise at all, at 3:00 AM, he woke up raring to go, wanting to play with me. As I was trying to wrap my foggy, sick brain around this, Joshua woke up crying. We were all stuffy nosed and coughing, so we had a nice little party in the bathroom with the shower running. Thankfully Joshua eventually went back to sleep, but Jeremiah isn't showing any signs of slowing down. I have declared that is reason enough to pop in a little Veggietales while I (hopefully) snooze on the couch (once I finish this post). Sometimes you have to improvise and do what it takes to get through the day, even if it means temporarily using the tv as a babysitter.  I'll post pictures in another post. 

PS. I just finalized the above post, looking forward to that snooze, when Jeremiah jumped on me begging to read books, and I hear Joshua awake in his room. Looks like my day is up and running, fully rested or not!  Have a great day!

We're Moving!

Joshua turned 7 months old this week! He weighs 13 lbs 6 oz now, and he is doing so well. He is a whole different baby since we changed his formula to Nutramigen prior to my last post, so happy and content, and he's sleeping much better, too. Personally, I don't get it. Nutramigen smells like dog food (disgusting!); he gobbles it down like it's candy, but he never did let us feed him my nice yummy breastmilk that I so painstakingly pumped and froze for him. After that rough patch in August, as long as he's eating something and growing like he is, I'm happy. I'm pleased to report my pumped milk is not going to waste because my friend Kimberly's babies (precious twins recently adopted from Ethiopia) love it!

Joshua had a couple of great doctor's appointments this week.  He saw the ophthalmologist for his 6 month follow up, and he passed his 3rd, and final, test to rule out ROP (retinopathy of prematurity).  No issues at all with his vision!  He also saw the cardiologist, and his echo looks great, too.  He just has a "normal variant" that they want to follow until he's one year old, but nothing concerning.  They can't figure out why he still needs oxygen since his heart issue (atrial septal defect) has pretty much resolved (just a tiny, inconsequential opening left), but they aren't concerned.  The cardiologist said we just need to move to a place lower in altitude, and we'll have nothing to worry about.  Speaking of that...

In a couple of weeks, we will be moving to the Gulf Coast of Mississippi.  James got orders to Keesler Air Force Base in Biloxi, MS.  We were disappointed at first because we really got attached to our home, church, friends, family, and neighbors here in Colorado, and we didn't have a say in what our new assignment would be. Quite honestly, we wouldn't have even put it on our preference worksheet if we had an option.  For about a day and a half, we experienced the five stages of grief (denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance) straight out of a textbook.  The first thing James said was, "We are NOT going to let Jeremiah play with any natives down there because I don't want him talking like a hillbilly!" We immediately realized how impossible that would be, so we cracked up at the thought, which was a major tension breaker.  Then, as I was in the "depression" phase the day after we got the news, James enlightened me with a new perspective during Jeremiah's bedtime story.  Jeremiah has been completely obsessed with the Biblical account of Jonah, and he wants me to tell him the story, which he calls "Jonah Cucumber" thanks to the VeggieTales, about 30 times every night before bed. The night after we heard the news of our assignment, I was in the middle of the part where God tells Jonah to "Go to Ninevah," and James walked in.  He said, "I think Keesler is our Ninevah.  God must want us there for some reason." The light bulb turned on, and I suddenly agreed, and acceptance hit. 

Since then, we have gotten excited about the move...well as excited as you could get leaving a place a wonderful as Monument, CO.  As written above, I now sell it as "The Gulf Coast" rather than "The Armpit Of The Country" (ha ha), so you can tell I've warmed up to the idea.  The people down there are really nice.  Beach life should be fun (although I suspect Jeremiah is expecting to see Jonah freshly regurgitated from the whale since that's his only frame of reference to the beach).  Home prices are super cheap, and this will be a great job for James.  He's excited to get back into orthopedics after spending the last 2+ years training and racing triathlons and marathons. Plus, the entire base closes down every other Friday. What's not to love about a 3 day weekend every other week?  Bottom line, I'm determined to be a good military wife and bloom where I'm planted.  After all we've gone through this past year, we try not to let the little things get to us.  As long as we're together as a family, who cares where we are!

A few people have asked me about Joshua's development.  Here's the scoop.  We just have to wait and see what kind of developmental delays he'll have, if any.  So far he's checking all the major ones off the list right on time.  On September 13th, when Joshua's adjusted age was 4 months and 1 week, we were pretty excited when he rolled front to back, right on schedule (in case you didn't see the video posted on Facebook, I included it at the end of this post).  He can ALMOST roll back to front now, too. A physical therapist comes out to our house for an hour of therapy with him once a week, and she seems to think he's coming along well.  The latest focus is on his hip flexors which are tight from laying sprawled out on a NICU bed for nearly 3 months when he should have been tightly packed in with his feet up by his head. 

Scroll down for the latest pictures. The first is a video. The boys love getting tickled to the "Itsy Bitsy Spider." By the time I got the camera out, it was the third time with Joshua, so he wasn't giggling as hard as he did at first. I got a kick out of Jeremiah at the end.



 Joshua looks up to his big brother, and Jeremiah just adores his little brother.

 

 First time sitting in the high chair like a big boy!

 

Here are some pictures taken since my last post. If you are my friend on Facebook, you probably saw some of them already, but I want to include them here as well for my own blog/keepsake. I got the best birthday present: our first family hike!  We walked up nearby Mt. Herman, last mentioned in a previous post Motherhood Mayhem.  It was such a fun day! 

 

All those days sitting in the NICU so many months ago, I dreamed of taking Joshua out and showing him God's wonderful creation firsthand.  He liked it so much, he fell asleep.  :)

 Enjoying a little picnic on the top of Mt Herman (overlooking Monument).

 

 I love these guys!  The bigger Jeremiah gets, the more fun it gets to hike with James (slows him down a tad, closer to my pace).

 

 

Joshua's rolling now!

6 Months Old!

Joshua is 6 months old! Actually, he has been for a few days now. On Sept 7^th, he’ll turn “4 months adjusted," based on his due date. That’s the age we go by when following milestones and answering questions from strangers.

 

 

 On his 6th month birthday, Joshua got his first ride in his "car."  He loved it!

 

August started out great visiting family in Minnesota. We visited at the end of July, and Joshua really thrived at that lower altitude; he didn’t need to wear his oxygen. Jeremiah had a blast with his cousins.



Living it up with two of his favs, "Yaynee" and "RyRy."

 

"Look, Ma, no oxygen!"  It's good to be at Grandma and Grandpa's house (near sea level)!

 

A rare pic of our family together.

 

 

Jeremiah had fun singing his ABC's last month with Grandma Gus and Aunt Greta.

 

Jeremiah showing off his rendition of Pat-a-Cake to his cousins in Minnesota.

Then we returned to Colorado, and things got pretty bad.  I weaned off pumping, so Joshua no longer got the freshly expressed milk.  No big deal since we have a deep freezer stocked full of frozen pumped milk (about a 3 month supply).  Well, it turns out he hates the taste of frozen/thawed milk.  He absolutely refused to drink it any which way we thawed/prepared it. Ok, that’s unfortunate after all those late night pumping sessions, but at least we have formula, right?  Well, the same formula that we had been using to augment my fresh milk suddenly caused a reaction of projectile vomiting right after feeding when it was given full strength.  

Bottom line, Joshua's reflux got a lot worse, and he also developed a reaction to the formula, likely an allergy to milk.  This is all clear to us in retrospect, but it took a lot of trial and error with reflux meds and dosages, formula:breast milk ratios, rice cereal, etc to figure out.  During those two weeks, he would not eat more than an ounce or two over several hours, and he seemed to cry nonstop all day, wouldn’t let us put him down, wouldn’t sleep unless we held him, and he just seemed to be in pain.  He had been gaining about 1-1.5 oz a day, but during those 2 weeks, he LOST a total of 5.5 oz rather than gaining 14-21 oz.   It was pretty stressful on all of us.  Finally, as we were contemplating whether or not to bring him to the hospital for dehydration, we made a last ditch effort and ran to Wal Mart to buy a can of Nutramigen formula (the protein is partially broken down, for cow’s milk allergy).  That was the magic bullet.  He just guzzled it down, and he didn’t throw up.  Since he has been on that, he has been great, happy, content, sleeping on his own, and back to gaining 1-2 oz a day.  He topped 12 lbs today (12 lbs, 0.5 oz to be exact)!  He’s like a “normal” happy baby now.  Whew!  We’re praying this continues because formula reactions can take about 2 weeks to present with babies. 

I’M WONDERING IF AT LEAST ONE MOM OUT THERE CAN RELATE TO THIS STORY:

One day, after being awake every 1-2 hours with Joshua during the night, I reached my breaking point. James was out of town serving as the medical director for a big international rugby tournament, something I was trained to do in my sports medicine fellowship, and I was “stuck” in the trenches at home, totally sleep deprived.  Joshua was refusing to eat, crying nonstop, and when I looked away for a second, Jeremiah, my sweet thoughtful boy, came up to him and just wound up and hit him on the head.  Now, if I stepped out of the situation and looked in, I’d say can you blame him?  If I had an annoying toy that wouldn’t stop making noise, I’d hit it to see what happens, too.  This “annoying toy” was causing Mommy to not give Jeremiah the attention he needed.  But I wasn’t objectively looking in from an outsider’s view. I was at my wits end already, stressed out that Joshua was losing weight and not eating, and I could barely think straight because I was so tired, and I was feeling sorry for myself for being a prisoner in my own home because we still don’t take Joshua out much. I dragged Jeremiah to time out and plopped him down.  Now with TWO screaming kids, I lost it. I put my face in my hands, signed deeply, and just silently prayed, “LORD, I CAN’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!  Puh-leeeeze help me before I go completely insane!”  Amazingly, Jeremiah suddenly stopped crying and sweetly said, “Hey Mommy, isn’t it fun having Joshua home from hospo?”  My head jerked up in shock, and I looked at him to see if he was serious. He was smiling. I said, “Do you really think it’s fun to have Joshua home?” and he nodded his head and said, “Yes!”  Even more amazing, at least temporarily, Joshua stopped crying, too.  My bad mood veil lifted as I remembered promising myself several months ago that I would never complain if things got difficult at home because the worst day at home is still better than the best day in the NICU.   I knew we’d make it through the day, and we did.  Yes, the Lord can speak through children when He needs His message to get across clearly.  Sanity preserved…for one more day at least. 



 

We've Been Home Four Weeks Now

Time for an  update. All is GOOD!  Since we have gotten home from the hospital, Joshua has been thriving. In the NICU, he was consistently falling into the < 3rd percentile for weight, not even on the growth chart. In each of his weekly visits to the pediatrician, he has been climbing up the chart, from 4th, to 7th, to 11th and 10th percentile.  Today he weighs 8 lbs 5.5 oz.  His eating has improved so much. He is now able to take a full bottle (80-85 mL, almost 3 oz) in 20-30 minutes, and it isn't so stressful to feed him like it was when we first brought him home. It's like feeding a normal baby.  Just a few days ago, things finally clicked, and he is now able to nurse without any issues, too.  He just latches right on without putting up a fight.  That makes me happy!

Two days ago, June 18th, Joshua turned 6 weeks old (adjusted age based on his due date).  We had a big day. For starters, Joshua hit Jeremiah's birth weight, 8 lbs 4 oz. Then that evening, James was talking to him, and he suddenly smiled.  He showed us 5 big grins, definitely social smiles.  This is a big deal for us because we don't know if Joshua will have developmental delays. Time will tell, and we just have to see how he does.  So far, he has been right on track.  The social smile was the last of the 6 week milestones we were waiting to conquer.

One other piece of good news:  We met with the cardiologist last week, and the repeat echo showed Joshua's ASD (hole in the heart) has closed.  It's no longer a concern!  His pressures were up, but that may just be because he was screaming and crying during the test. He will follow up again next month for another echocardiogram to make sure it's nothing to worry about.  In the meantime, he continues to be on oxygen, but we're hoping it won't be for long.
We still keep him pretty sheltered. He hasn't left the house except for doctors appointments.  I'm hoping he'll soon get the go-ahead to attend church and maybe even playgroup at the park, but I have a feeling the latter is still a ways off.  I'm getting a little stir crazy not being able to take him anywhere, but if that's my biggest concern after all we've been through, I can't complain. We are just so thankful! 

Jeremiah is loving his role as Big Brother. He is so lovey to Joshua, and he talks to him and reads to him all the time. He is bound and determined to make sure Joshua knows which trucks have wheels and which have treaded tracks, as we hear him explain to Joshua with his books and trucks over and over all day long.  He also walks around saying "Only Mommy and Dad carry Baby Joshua," so we know he would like nothing better than to carry him around the house. Thankfully he has a little discretion, and I haven't yet caught him dragging Joshua around!   

 Ok, I was making Joshua smile while holding the camera off to the side. I never claimed to be a professional photographer anyway. But check out those chubby cheeks!

  Now he starts working it for the camera!

 Joshua's first time cuddling with Grandma Pat!

Jeremiah in Heaven with his new chainsaw and Scoop from Bob the Builder, his latest obsession.

Thanks, Aunt Linda! 

A Little Father's Day Love...

Life Outside the NICU

Ok, ok, I'll write another post.  Enough already!  Ha ha.  I am pleased to say life is great being home together as a family.  My children's names are already "Jerjoshua" and "Jahjeremiah," just as my name tended to be "Heidigretakarrn" whenever my mom got flustered. I'm hoping my tongue-tiedness will improve as I get used to being home with both boys.

To all you mothers of multiple kids, I have a new found respect for you.  You all have made it look so easy, and I now see that's not the case.  I hate to admit it (tho there is some pride at my ingenuity), but last night I realized if I ditch the pajamas and go to bed in a t-shirt and shorts instead, I won't be in my pajamas all day the next day.  I'm sure I'm not the first new mom to go this route (maybe I should be more amazed it took me a week to figure it out?).

I feel like we're just a normal sleep deprived family with a newborn now, getting up during the night for feeds. I have finally mastered the pumping while bottle feeding trick, so my 1.5 hour wake periods have decreased to an hour every 3 hours.  One good thing about the bottle is James can help out by taking a feed, making things much more bearable for me.

The one thing that reminds me that things are not "normal" is Joshua's eating habits. Sometimes it is such a struggle to get him to eat, and we have been conditioned to freak out and declare "failed ad-lib demand trial, needs a tube" if he doesn't eat his full allotment of 70+ mL q 4 hours.  Therefore, we have been known to spend 2 hours a feed to try to get that volume in him, and it can be a struggle.  We have come to realize he seems to make up for it a couple of hours later with an 80 mL feed, and at 7 lbs 3 oz, he is gaining weight well, so we are starting to relax more. 

Joshua refuses to nurse, which breaks my heart, but I haven't given up yet.  I know, it's not that big of a deal, but part of me feels like I'm being rejected.  Sorry for the drama there.  In the grand scheme of things, if that's the only complaint I have coming out of the NICU, I'll take it!  He's still getting my milk.  I'm pumping around the clock, so my days are spent seemingly tied up to the pump or a bottle all day long.  Thankfully Jeremiah is a gem by seeming content to just sit by Joshua and me, reading or playing with his trucks with me.  The other night we went for a walk to introduce Joshua to the neighbors.  He was all tied up in the Moby wrap, and I had his oxygen hanging from my shoulder, and Jeremiah led the way.  It was fun to get out of the house.

One other "not normal" thing is the 25 ft oxygen tubing stemming from a gigantic O2 tank in the center of our house.  It's annoying having a constant tether, especially with a 2 year old getting caught up in the tubing with his feet or his riding cars, giving me a heart attack for the potential of one child falling and hurting himself and one baby losing his oxygen supply.  Since we live 1500 ft higher than the hospital (7400 ft), his oxygen requirements increased when we got home.  He'll probably be on it for at least another month or two.  We'll see.

Jeremiah is a terrific big brother, still showering Joshua with kisses all day long.  Every time Joshua cries, Jeremiah is quick to act all concerned and say, "It's o-tay, Baby Joshua!"  He also reads books to him and loves to put his cars right in front of Joshua's face to show him how cool they are.  He has had a couple of moments of mild naughtiness directly related to me holding Joshua (such as stealing the pacifier and running away), but nothing I would consider an abnormal reaction to a two year old going through this transition.  He has also been more clingy than usual, but I don't mind that. As a nurse pointed out to me, just think if your husband came home and said, "Honey, I found another wife, and I'm bringing her home to us. I don't love you any less.  I love you both the same..." Naw, that wouldn't go over so well.  So why do we expect a child to feel any differently? 

That's about it, in a nutshell!  I do miss the nurses (especially at 3 AM), but it's fun to be getting into a normal, mundane routine at home.  Now I'm just looking forward to being able to venture out of the house more.  As Joshua gets bigger and stronger, we'll do just that. 

People have asked me if Joshua looks like Jeremiah. I don't see much resemblance except for some facial expressions that I haven't been able to catch on camera. I tried to re-enact a photo with Joshua at the same age (adjusted) as Jeremiah, 3 weeks old. Jeremiah is on the right.

What woman can resist a pic of her man and baby chilling out together?!

Fun Day At Home

Well, after 76 days in a row of going to the NICU, I took a mental health break today.  Yep, I played hookie.  James was able to go in, so I didn't feel too guilty.  Oh boy, was it good!  I had so much fun with Jeremiah.  This morning we went for a walk with some friends and had a big play date at the park with some ladies from my mom's group.  After that, I was able to get some cleaning done with my favorite little helper, something that would ordinarily be mundane but today was new and exciting because it was a glimpse of life getting back to normal.  We also made brownies together, which Jeremiah loved.  Then some other friends came over after James came home, and we all went on a hike up Mt. Herman, one of my favorite local hikes.  Yes I'm still very much out of shape, but I survived, in case you were wondering.  It was my first hike in at least five months.  Ok, I know you don't care to hear details of my boring, routine life, but that's what makes it so blog worthy: we are almost back into our boring, routine life!  Yes! 

Joshua did really well today. He is really tackling the bottle, and he's getting all the nutrition he needs. 
Last night, Joshua weighed in at 2815 grams, 6 lbs 3 oz.  He gained 25 g.  I'll have to post tonight's weight tomorrow.  I plan to room in tomorrow, so we'll see if I can handle him without the monitor and everything.  I think he'll be fine.  Tomorrow's lab (sodium level) determines if we go home Thursday or Monday.  It's best to just plan on Monday and be pleasantly surprised if it's Thursday.  We have the house ready, so if we find out at the last minute, I won't freak out this time. 

That's about it.  Good night.

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day!  I'm so thankful God gave me the best mom in the world!  No offense to you other mothers; I'm sure you're pretty good, too.  But you can't top mine.  :) 

Today I was able to be with Joshua for three feedings.  Each one went very well, and he didn't need anything extra through his NG tube.  The plan is to reevaluate tomorrow, and if they are pleased with how he has done, he'll start another ad-lib demand trial, this time for 3 days instead of two, since he tuckered out after 52 hours last time.  I have a feeling we'll be home by the end of the week, but I don't want to get ahead of myself.

Last night Joshua gained 10 g, now up to 2810 g or 6 lbs 3 oz. I just called in, and he hasn't been weighed yet.  A volunteer cuddler was holding him. I'm so thankful for the volunteers.  What a great volunteer job to have, too!  The nurses have three babies each, and they are busy with nursing care, so they aren't able to give all of their attention to one baby.  It's nice to know people are available to just cuddle Joshua when he needs/wants attention, instead of just fussing alone in his crib when we're not there.  Hmmmm, I wonder if I could take one of those volunteers home with me when we go home?  :)

Today James and Jeremiah came to visit Joshua while I was there.  Believe it or not, it has taken almost 11 weeks, but we finally managed to get ONE picture of the four of us together.  That was one shot before Jeremiah squirmed away from us.  Between a two year old who has an aversion to cameras and a 32 year old who's even worse, it's a challenge for me to get a good photo.  You may have noticed how rare it is to see a picture of James in my blog. He does an amazing job hiding from me when I get the camera out.

Our only photo of us as a family of four. Jeremiah is in mid-squirm, trying to escape.

Joshua got his very own Mama Roo (left side of picture), just like the one he uses in the hospital (it's like a baby swing).  Jeremiah had fun playing in the packaging it came in.

DUE DATE!

Today's the day!  This is the date circled on my calendar that says, "DUE DATE!!!!"  Little did I know, when I wrote that last fall, that Joshua would be over 2 months old by this date.  Today one of the nurses said happy birthday and sighed and said, "You wouldn't have wanted to be in labor today, anyway. It's so gray and rainy out there."  I appreciated the sentiment and didn't mention that I thought yesterday sure would have been a nice sunny, perfect for labor, day. 

I have heard other preemie moms say as soon as their babies hit the due date, things just click, and they suddenly eat really well.  I'm hoping that's the case for us, too.  Today, Joshua hasn't been eating quite as well as he did yesterday. Here's the good news: a new doctor rotated onto Joshua's team, and she recommended we do a 48 hour trial of "ad-lib demand."  That means rather than waking him up to eat every three hours, he runs the show and tells us when he wants to eat, basically like a normal newborn. It also means he won't have to get an exact amount (like the current 51 mL), so we'll just give him as much as he wants.  I'm super excited about this because of the 10 babies next door that I've seen come and go, they switch to "ad-lib demand" right before they go home.  It's a guarded enthusiasm, though, because the doctor stressed to me that this is just a TRIAL to see how he handles it and if can gain weight well on this regimen. 

Last night, he weighed the same as the night before, 2550 g or 5 lbs 10 oz. 

Jeremiah had a big day today.  This morning I took him to Sport Clipss for his first professional haircut.  We had the best stylist, Karen. At first, Jeremiah wasn't very excited about it, and he didn't want to sit in the chair or wear the cape.  Then Karen just got down on the floor and started playing with him and reading to him, and every now and then she'd sneak in a snip here and there.  I don't think he even realized he was getting his hair cut.

First Haircut!

After we got home, Jeremiah found a new "hat," and he danced around doing his version of the salsa. (Get it?  It's a bag of tortilla chips.  Chips and salsa.  Ha ha).