To all you mothers of multiple kids, I have a new found respect for you. You all have made it look so easy, and I now see that's not the case. I hate to admit it (tho there is some pride at my ingenuity), but last night I realized if I ditch the pajamas and go to bed in a t-shirt and shorts instead, I won't be in my pajamas all day the next day. I'm sure I'm not the first new mom to go this route (maybe I should be more amazed it took me a week to figure it out?).
I feel like we're just a normal sleep deprived family with a newborn now, getting up during the night for feeds. I have finally mastered the pumping while bottle feeding trick, so my 1.5 hour wake periods have decreased to an hour every 3 hours. One good thing about the bottle is James can help out by taking a feed, making things much more bearable for me.
The one thing that reminds me that things are not "normal" is Joshua's eating habits. Sometimes it is such a struggle to get him to eat, and we have been conditioned to freak out and declare "failed ad-lib demand trial, needs a tube" if he doesn't eat his full allotment of 70+ mL q 4 hours. Therefore, we have been known to spend 2 hours a feed to try to get that volume in him, and it can be a struggle. We have come to realize he seems to make up for it a couple of hours later with an 80 mL feed, and at 7 lbs 3 oz, he is gaining weight well, so we are starting to relax more.
Joshua refuses to nurse, which breaks my heart, but I haven't given up yet. I know, it's not that big of a deal, but part of me feels like I'm being rejected. Sorry for the drama there. In the grand scheme of things, if that's the only complaint I have coming out of the NICU, I'll take it! He's still getting my milk. I'm pumping around the clock, so my days are spent seemingly tied up to the pump or a bottle all day long. Thankfully Jeremiah is a gem by seeming content to just sit by Joshua and me, reading or playing with his trucks with me. The other night we went for a walk to introduce Joshua to the neighbors. He was all tied up in the Moby wrap, and I had his oxygen hanging from my shoulder, and Jeremiah led the way. It was fun to get out of the house.
One other "not normal" thing is the 25 ft oxygen tubing stemming from a gigantic O2 tank in the center of our house. It's annoying having a constant tether, especially with a 2 year old getting caught up in the tubing with his feet or his riding cars, giving me a heart attack for the potential of one child falling and hurting himself and one baby losing his oxygen supply. Since we live 1500 ft higher than the hospital (7400 ft), his oxygen requirements increased when we got home. He'll probably be on it for at least another month or two. We'll see.
Jeremiah is a terrific big brother, still showering Joshua with kisses all day long. Every time Joshua cries, Jeremiah is quick to act all concerned and say, "It's o-tay, Baby Joshua!" He also reads books to him and loves to put his cars right in front of Joshua's face to show him how cool they are. He has had a couple of moments of mild naughtiness directly related to me holding Joshua (such as stealing the pacifier and running away), but nothing I would consider an abnormal reaction to a two year old going through this transition. He has also been more clingy than usual, but I don't mind that. As a nurse pointed out to me, just think if your husband came home and said, "Honey, I found another wife, and I'm bringing her home to us. I don't love you any less. I love you both the same..." Naw, that wouldn't go over so well. So why do we expect a child to feel any differently?
That's about it, in a nutshell! I do miss the nurses (especially at 3 AM), but it's fun to be getting into a normal, mundane routine at home. Now I'm just looking forward to being able to venture out of the house more. As Joshua gets bigger and stronger, we'll do just that.
People have asked me if Joshua looks like Jeremiah. I don't see much resemblance except for some facial expressions that I haven't been able to catch on camera. I tried to re-enact a photo with Joshua at the same age (adjusted) as Jeremiah, 3 weeks old. Jeremiah is on the right.
What woman can resist a pic of her man and baby chilling out together?!
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